Saturday, 3 September 2011

Regrets







he lies, lies wrapped around in those white sheets...
he sees, sees tears rolling down his mothers cheeks...
he hears, hears loud sobs in his sisters voice
he feels, feels helpless because he doesnt have a choice


he looks up, and sees the devils face
its laughing hysterically,laughing without grace
as he sees its eyes filled with malice
he couldn't help but pine, for those wasted days


he stares towards the heaven
sees an angel crying on the seventh
they say ,he would have been able, to reach there level
if in transgression..he hadn't fallen



but now all he can do is frenetically wait
to enter in those, inexcusable gates
a place that's not of bliss, but of abyss
for he had been sinful in all life's ways 
and he couldn't get it right now
because, regretfully ,its just too late...




" i am not scared of dying, i am scared of the deedless bags i would be carrying to my Lord"

Friday, 2 September 2011

A whisper...

             
...she curls up uncomfortably in her warm yet cold bed, and her head desperately reaches to rest on her knees...as she dives,deeper in the blanket...she still finds it impossible to hide herself away...she wants to submerge herself even more in the unfathomable darkness...the inexhaustible misery keeps pulling her downwards...and the swim through the vortex of her shallow yet boundless dreams seems unending.


she thinks over and over about what had happened, but she is unable to grasp the foundation...unable to blame...unable to face...unable to choose...unable to succumb...yet unable to die...
was it her?...was it him?...or was it just God...?
she desperately waits, for a signal, a sign, a voice, a way...


she could have shifted to the dryer side of the pillow, but she stays on the damp part. she is in love with her desolation, its the only thing that's left of him. 
as the damp pillow becomes more sodden by her nimble tears she laughs out of helplessness and whispers something to the darkness that surrounds her.


recalling those times drive her insane, those words, those dreams, those hopes...she was the one to put an end to it...she was the one to blame...but she was the one who was forced to...she was the one who had to choose...she was the one who had purposely crashed all her dreams away...she was the one who pushed him away by her own words...
her earlier actions make her feel more lonely than ever, they make her regret even more....but at some point she is still bewildered...she had tried so hard to find a place in the world...forgetting where her whole world lied ..


her mouth whimpers a whisper...
but the whisper goes unheard, unobserved, and ignored again...the more wasted it becomes...the more frantic it gets...and she reiterates it all over again...!


till that soundless whisper seems perceptible...and the wind makes out those sinuous words ...which  utter...



                 " do me a favor,be the first to let me go"

Monday, 29 August 2011

the BIG event! :D

..As my driver impatiently honks through the traffic at Clifton...swearing loudly...i sit at the back, clutching my handbag, and those numerous shopping bags, of J.J, Khadi,Mumtaz Abdullah, Threads & Motives and Sentiments. with this satisfied smile over my face. i had literally surfed through every mall and bazzare of  Karachi with my sister and had shopped till <my driver had> dropped...<seriously i admire his patience to wait for someone like me who is as dreadfully and unbeatably indecisive as me>


its 12:30pm yet still....the roads are crammed full of cars,bikes,rickshaws,buses,chinichis...and whatever kinda transport you can dream of...i mean like even gadha garis!:P.
 but i soooo love it!:D:D:D
 



 it reminds me that Eid is almost at our doorsteps...and its preparations and shoppings are banging at our doors!:D
i love the way its the only day i wake up early in the morning....to have breaksfast...<3
i love the way it makes us sooo rich with EIDI!:D
i love the way its only eid when i can actually see the floor of my room.
i love the way i wear like something OTHER THAN my normal pajamas...in other words, something more PRESENTABLE =P
i love the chan chan of bangles....and the aroma of mehendi <3

and i love love love the way the whole of KARACHI is so dressed up.
the way each dhaba is lighted up with small shimmery lights...
and the way smiles could be seen across everyones face....the siwayyan and the sheer khurma...<even though i must admit i personaly dont like them..yet they still add a charm to eid>  oh and the chapli kababs and cakes....<3

also i love the way its the first time all masjids are crammed full of people for the Eids special namaz, and the way everyone greets a BIG eid mubarak to each, forgetting all their differences and enmity.

to all the Pakistanis: lets hope this eid will still be as beautiful and joyous as it usually is, lets all pray that we dont get to see anymore sad faces, death, funerals and violence on the roads of karachi...lets hope that the politicians atleast wait for Eid to get past them before solving their never ending disputes...and lets hope that the "hungami halat" of pakistan dont take place on eid day...:)
ameen!
have an awesome eid everyone :) <3