A whisper...

             
...she curls up uncomfortably in her warm yet cold bed, and her head desperately reaches to rest on her knees...as she dives,deeper in the blanket...she still finds it impossible to hide herself away...she wants to submerge herself even more in the unfathomable darkness...the inexhaustible misery keeps pulling her downwards...and the swim through the vortex of her shallow yet boundless dreams seems unending.


she thinks over and over about what had happened, but she is unable to grasp the foundation...unable to blame...unable to face...unable to choose...unable to succumb...yet unable to die...
was it her?...was it him?...or was it just God...?
she desperately waits, for a signal, a sign, a voice, a way...


she could have shifted to the dryer side of the pillow, but she stays on the damp part. she is in love with her desolation, its the only thing that's left of him. 
as the damp pillow becomes more sodden by her nimble tears she laughs out of helplessness and whispers something to the darkness that surrounds her.


recalling those times drive her insane, those words, those dreams, those hopes...she was the one to put an end to it...she was the one to blame...but she was the one who was forced to...she was the one who had to choose...she was the one who had purposely crashed all her dreams away...she was the one who pushed him away by her own words...
her earlier actions make her feel more lonely than ever, they make her regret even more....but at some point she is still bewildered...she had tried so hard to find a place in the world...forgetting where her whole world lied ..


her mouth whimpers a whisper...
but the whisper goes unheard, unobserved, and ignored again...the more wasted it becomes...the more frantic it gets...and she reiterates it all over again...!


till that soundless whisper seems perceptible...and the wind makes out those sinuous words ...which  utter...



                 " do me a favor,be the first to let me go"

Comments

  1. umna khan2 September 2011 at 06:59

    wohoo...! another brilliant piece of writing... =)

    ReplyDelete
  2. ..the floodgate of feelings..:]2 September 2011 at 07:00

    hehe thnx:):):)

    ReplyDelete
  3. meandmythinkingcap2 September 2011 at 07:07

    wonderful piece. heartwarming and touchy. So cute.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Miss H2 September 2011 at 07:22

    Simply beautiful - you're really talented! :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. ..the floodgate of feelings..:]2 September 2011 at 07:26

    @ meandmuthinkingcap....thanks:) for the compliment and for following:)

    @anonymous...what?:S i didnt get you?

    @hazel...thankyou...your compliment means a lot:)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Imad Khalid2 September 2011 at 07:59

    You are awesome in an imaginative world. You give so much to it.

    I love the way you write.

    ReplyDelete
  7. ..the floodgate of feelings..:]2 September 2011 at 08:09

    @iman khalid...awwh thankyou so much:)...its not imagination...its just expression...i haav been through what i write:)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Kiran Ashraf2 September 2011 at 09:36

    gives me chills..u write soooooo well :)get this piece published plz its awesome :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. A Spirit2 September 2011 at 09:48

    ...sometimes...u can't let go.. :)

    Your best one till yet...!! :) :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. MAHNOOR2 September 2011 at 10:01

    beee-yu-teeee-ful. im spellbounded. no one could have ever written it more beautifully =)

    love love loooove it

    ReplyDelete
  11. the butterfly effect2 September 2011 at 10:36

    its like reading what i've longed to put in words. this is no fiction, i'm guessing. even if it is, something is behind it. i know how no words that we write, do justice to what we actually feel, but that's the only thing close to an expression we can come up with.

    letting go, sometimes, means letting go of ourselves, too. and that is kinda impossible.

    if anything, this was sad. but that's life, isn't it?

    ReplyDelete
  12. ..the floodgate of feelings..:]2 September 2011 at 10:46

    @kiran ashraf...awwh :) i wish i can...but i dont know where to get my stuff published...suggest me some place:)

    @ a spirit...:) yeah and thats why you want the other person to do it for you:) thats why u want to let the other end of the rope be let go of:)

    @mahnoor...:) thankyou soo much...:)
    @ the butterfly effect...yeah its life,it wants to giv us so much...but we dont let it...and you are rite...there is a long story behind this blog:)

    ReplyDelete
  13. Devil In Disguise2 September 2011 at 11:28

    awwwwiiieee... sho cute... could feel it while reading it :))... Really good <3<3

    ReplyDelete
  14. ..the floodgate of feelings..:]2 September 2011 at 11:45

    :))) thankyouu..:)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Ovais2 September 2011 at 13:42

    Nai nai nai.
    This is SAD.
    Nai.

    ReplyDelete
  16. ..the floodgate of feelings..:]3 September 2011 at 00:07

    @ovais...hehe yeah...its nt jst sad...its a reality feedback about someone i knw...!:)

    ReplyDelete
  17. Fatima3 September 2011 at 02:24

    Sad and touching....but why did she let him go when all she wanted to never let go!

    Nice one :)

    TC

    ReplyDelete
  18. ..the floodgate of feelings..:]3 September 2011 at 03:01

    @fatima...because she had to choose between two things...! :)

    thanks:)

    ReplyDelete
  19. :)3 September 2011 at 03:20

    ..."he cannot let her go...because she wasn't just someone for him...but everything for him...she was...his existence"...

    ReplyDelete
  20. ateeq mughal3 September 2011 at 03:32

    my heart vibrated in an unknown way, when i reached the last line,
    itna touchy touchy stuff, kahan se ata he. :D

    ReplyDelete
  21. ..the floodgate of feelings..:]3 September 2011 at 04:13

    @ :)...hehehe yeah but sometimes big sacrifices have to be made...in order to achieve bgr result...:) u knw better though ;)

    @ateeq...hahaha it cums from the heart ateeq...thankyou:)

    ReplyDelete
  22. Aliza3 September 2011 at 05:26

    Believe me-I actually FELT each and every word of yours. Loved it! <3 (=

    ReplyDelete
  23. the butterfly effect3 September 2011 at 19:09

    may Allah give peace to your soul. amin

    ReplyDelete
  24. Anonymous5 September 2011 at 02:39

    I see, my ex-DP put to good use! It is really proud to be featured on this fabulous blog! :D'

    The post is wonderfully beautiful! No one describes feelings as good as you do! <3

    BTW have you ever considered writing as your future career?;)

    ReplyDelete

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ur tears dont neseccarily have to be sad ones...:D

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